KEN KIRSCHENBAUM, ESQ
ALARM - SECURITY INDUSTRY LEGAL EMAIL NEWSLETTER / THE ALARM EXCHANGE
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funny alarm response /  help with contract negotiations from unlikely source 
April 13, 2019
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funny alarm response
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Ken,
    ​ this is pretty funny. I thought maybe you would like to have a chuckle today.
    I have seen some pretty funny things before, but in all my years, I have never seen somethings like this. Of course, in my earlier years, a droid did not exist.
Gary Dawkins 
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Deputies surround burglar in Oregon home, find out suspect is Roomba trapped in bathroom
by KATU Staff

Captured - Washington County Sheriff's Office image
WASHINGTON COUNTY, Ore. (KATU) – Deputies responding to a 911 call for a "burglary in progress" at an Oregon woman’s home ended up catching the culprit – a robotic vacuum that was trapped in her bathroom.
The initial call came in from someone reporting that a stranger was in her bathroom, and that the person had the bathroom door locked, the sheriff's office said Tuesday in a post online.
She said she could see shadows moving under the door.
Within minutes several deputies surround the home, calling for a K9 team as backup. They say they could hear a rustling noise coming from the bathroom.
After calling to the “suspect” several times over a loudspeaker, deputies went into the home with their guns drawn. After opening the bathroom door, deputies say they found an automated robot vacuum crashing around on the floor.
“As we entered the home we could hear rustling in the bathroom. We made several announcements and the 'rustling' became more frequent. We breached the bathroom door and encountered a very thorough vacuuming job being done by a Roomba Robotic Vacuum cleaner,” the Washington County Sheriff’s Deputy Rogers wrote in his report of the incident.
No word on whether deputies filed charges in the incident, but the suspect’s record appears to be clean.
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help with contract negotiations from unlikely source
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Ken​
    To bad that “name withheld” from Friday April 5th is not a USA Central Station customer.
    My USA customers know that I am always willing to negotiate the contracts for free as a service to my customers. I have closed deals with government entities at all levels, corporations of all sizes and individuals (including know-it-all doctors and attorneys) for many years now with a 99% or better closing rate.
Bart A. Didden President 
U.S.A. Central Station Alarm Corp. 
Port Chester, NY 
Milford, CT 
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Response
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    Cool.  Just one question.  Besides practicing law without a license, will you be giving prostate exams and other medical procedures to your dealers?
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Ken Kirschenbaum,Esq
Kirschenbaum & Kirschenbaum PC
Attorneys at Law
200 Garden City Plaza
Garden City, NY 11530
516 747 6700 x 301
ken@kirschenbaumesq.com
www.KirschenbaumEsq.com